12 years!

mike and i have this “argument” frequently- i am antsy to leave manhattan for, well, a weekend (i’ll take anything- i just want to drive a car and walk through a grocery store!). he reminds me that we live in and love manhattan, and there’s no reason to leave. the truth is it’s RIDICULOUSLY expensive to leave- like, it makes NO sense. renting a car for a week is like $1800 (not exaggerating), which i agree is crazy. but the thought of being land locked on this bizarre island is weird. and we did choose to live here. and we give up a lot- one being travel of any sort. (these are also the moments i wonder why we sold our cars…….) we spend sufficient money just surviving here, and there’s nothing left over to leave just for fun. we had the chance to explore. and we did. remember dc!? EVERY WEEKEND we explored! but i’d be lying through my teeth if i didn’t say i missed traveling. this blog used to be SOLELY about our tales and travels! now? very little travel-portion:) 

this day, june 30th, marks our 12th wedding anniversary. we have a newborn. and 2 other not-so-baby babies. there are no trips, let alone couple-escape moments right now. next year when this baby is no longer attached to my boob, mike & me promised each other a beach getaway. just us two (anyone want to come babysit!?!). i’ll try and hold on to that anticipation. we’ve experienced so much. not only physically been around each other to experience life, but emotionally. spiritually. mentally. we’ve been on journeys that have broken us down and built us back up. the road is still a crazy one, and there isn’t a day that goes by where we don’t question what we’re doing or how long we’ll be able to do it, but what i can say is that this year- this june 30th, 2017- we are happy in this moment. we’re happy in this city. our family is complete. we’re in the best city in the world, with the people who make us the happiest- the core we fought to save is together, and that’s the greatest accomplishment i could have dreamed of 12 years ago.

i talked to a dear friend the other night and she made a comment that really struck me- she said that most people set up their lives in the way they believe it should go- marriage, kids, house, car, jobs, etc., then they live life and announce that they’re “open to the opportunities life throws at [them]!” she commented how this is an entirely lovely and admirable way to live- the way i think i assumed we would live as well. the trick is what one does when things don’t go entirely as planned. she said she admired people who don’t anticipate opportunities, but instead, they create their own. they forge their own path. they ask questions. they push forward, sometimes awkwardly, in creating their own adventures instead of anticipating the experiences come to them.

one of the learnings that's come to me so strongly this past year of marriage is just how great mike is at encouraging my individual happiness. he's always pushing me to do what i want to do- get out alone (or with friends), work if i want to work, sleep if i want to sleep, get a tattoo if i want a tattoo (i'm good, but it's the thought that counts;)- he's never judged me for a decision i've made, or made me feel like any part of our marriage or family life is more weighed on my side than his. the guy literally has no judgmental bones in his body- particularly when it comes to me- and i never realized just how unique a trait that is. 

mike wants me to be happy, and as i try and be more supportive of him in the same way (i'm not nearly as good at it as he is), i'm seeing that he's happier as a person- as a man, a dad, a husband. 

most days are monotonous. most nights are long and sleepless. most fights are silly. hindsight is 20/20. but it's the journey that counts. here's to another year of marriage. and forging our own path, wherever that may take us.

cheers to this next lucky #13, neighbor, and cheers to whatever journeys lie ahead...

1 comment:

  1. I love what you said about marriage. So much truth and thought in what you said. You really do have the cutest family.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...