6.01.2015

saying goodbye to salt lake.

two years ago we were in the throws of building our house- it was such a sweet time for our family. 
we signed the building contract on valentines 2013. we drove by each morning, and walked by each evening to look at the progress- first when i was pregnant and waddling, then with our tiny, brand new baby boy. we broke in and dreamed and imagined and eventually called it home. we tried to fill it with love and comfort and happiness. we decorated and learned and laughed and fought (with each other, as well as a whole heck of a lot of voles). we cheered on many of jude's firsts, celebrated milestones, and gathered with family for the holidays. we stretched out and got comfy. we loved this house- a house we didn't imaging saying goodbye to for a long time. this house was one of the hardest things to let go of- maybe the hardest- because we weren't ready, and there really wasn't a good reason to walk away, but we realized we needed to. my heart is full of love and fond memories, but it's also filled with the confirmation that our time in that house- in that neighborhood, in that place- is done, and it was/is time for a new chapter. 

the two weeks between when life was "normal," to accepting a job offer thousands of miles away, to then physically being in dc, was a complete whirlwind. it was full of miracles. we didn't think we even wanted to sell this house, but a week after we moved we got a great offer and thought it was a done deal. well, as usually is the case, the whole process was much more complicated than we imagined. (our buyers had buyers, and those buyers... well, lets just say they did some shady things.) days turned into weeks and then months. fear of selling turned into us just wanting to be done- the house turned into a tether that made us feel like we couldn't move on. 

as of last friday, it's officially done. our house is no longer ours. it's now home to a sweet new family who will fill it will love and celebrations and milestones and many more memories.

this past valentines day, super last-minute, just as we were prepping to list and move and pull our hair out. the same day as were literally selling our car (hence why mike is missing in so many of these), just before we ripped most our belongings off the wall to stage for showings, and as i ran off to a work event, mandi nelson came over to take pictures of us just being here, in the place we created as a family of 4. they're perfect. no shopping for outfits, no thinking of a good location, and nothing planned or fancy. it was just life in the middle of chaos...
those two years in our "big" house will always be some of the hardest, but some of the sweetest ever. my heart flutters just looking at these photos- life now seems so different; at the same time, i sometimes miss the sounds and sights within those walls- the creak of a certain stair, the light that poured in from our front door window, our huge island that was the center of food and fun and play, the saga of jude's black ceiling, elle's flamingo pink walls, the floors that were impossible to keep clean... that house was a structure we built as a place of refuge and peace, but it was a place that gave us re-direction and purpose as to where we needed to refocus our lives as a family. 

mike and i watched casey neistat videos in all our spare late-night time this past weekend, and something he said totally stuck with me about "golden handcuffs." we had great lives, but were miserable. we went on a path we felt great about until that road we were on no longer seemed like it was the right one for us- it was just going in the wrong direction. i'm so happy to have taken this huge leap and walked away from all we worked so hard to create...   
wow, i sure hope it works out:) 

i will forever cherish these little moments of frozen time, from a crazy day, in a crazy month, of our crazy lives. thank you, mandi!!

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