facelift for 1, please.

there are a few things in life that bug me.
one of those things: optional body parts. 
ridiculous if you ask me.
i had 3 wisdom teeth taken out a couple years ago...
but the last one was SUCH a doosey that no one wanted to touch it unless it was an "emergency."
apparently the "emergency" time had come so i found a surgeon who would take it out with a local anesthetic (i have a paranoia of being knocked out. i'm afraid of puking.).
i know, weird.

yesterday was the big day...
& after squeezing my eyes shut for a nasty 30 minutes and blaring dashboard confessional in my iPhone
i left like this ^

what the...?
i felt like heidi montag.
only... so much less dramatic of a change.
wait... yah. nothing is different except a bunch of stitches and many open wounds in my mouth.
i actually heard mr. surgeon man say the word, "BOULDER!" like 6 times as he and the nurse held my head in their 4 hands and drilled & pulled for dear life...)
after we came home mike took elle on a bike ride to the park & ran into all the cute little mommies.
they all thought he was soooo dreamy for being a super-dad & taking the day off to nurse me back to health.
i think he's soooo dreamy for not passing out during the birth of elle...
& now 2 successful wisdom-tooth-extraction-ordeals.
mikey made an eye appointment at the gateway for 10:00 today.
thinking the fresh air would help my incessant bleeding and pounding headache, i joined him.
so did 4,986 others.
apparently it was the st. patrick's day parade!
whatever. it was fun to be around people.
i told elle we were in disneyland.
and then i changed it to ireland...
after all, i didn't want her to think disney was lame or anything.

on the way out the psycho strict old lady parking attendant decided to lecture me on the rules of not having a parking ticket (I SWEAR THE GATE WAS OPEN AND NO TICKET CAME OUT WHEN I ARRIVED!).
this lecture lasted 10 minutes.
i kept telling her i'd just give her 6 validation fine if she'd let me go.
 i could feel the curses from the 28 car backup behind us (seriously, i could feel their vexes).

did i mention an ice pack was held to my face, my kid was blaring "special agent oso" in the backseat, and mike's eyes were dialated so he looked like a creepy cougar (a cat-cougar, not like a 60-year-old lady cougar).
beautiful family, i tell you.

now, a special shoutout to my mom who brought me teabags.
mom, i love you.
those blessed but gross teabags ceased bleeding that had been gagging me for 27 straight hours!
oh, and the tea reminded me of my cute grandma.
it's cuter to smell tea than to let fester in one's mouth.
sick again.

back to love:
mama- i love you!
and you surgeon man.
and you mikey.

i do still have a bone to pick with someone about those extra body parts, however...

1 comment:

  1. Please don't think I'm a weirdy. I love the way you write. So, yes I read your blog. I hope that is okay. If it makes you feel better....I know people who know you. And I went to school with Mike. ??? Does that help the weird factor?

    Anyways. Love to read your blog. Elle is beautiful!


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